The Un-verbal Virginity Clause.
As western societies take the waves on topics challenging body shaming, fertility, abortion, and contraceptives, there is a detrimental lacking of voice in the Middle Eastern region for a woman’s peep of their own physical ownership. And it’s bad. There’s no sugar coating it.
How bad is it? Well for one, it is sitting on the brim of politicization. In the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, women were told by the male custodians of the monarchy that they would finally be relieved of wearing an abaya. They were applauded and praised for such forward plausible ideologies. Archaeologists discovered 9000 +years of civilization tracing back to domesticated horse sites in the Arabian Peninsula, so it took a while to permit women to garment themselves in the attire of their choice. About time? No. When will the time come where men no longer have the authority to dictate women’s attributes associated with their physical appearance? Why are they so obsessed with telling us what to wear?
From a cultural perspective , women in certain tribes and societies are frowned upon if their hands are visible . It’s scandalous if your third cousin caught a hot glimpse of your cuticle’s complexion under that all black outfit you’ve been parading in for as long as you can sorrowfully remember.
Let’s be sensible. As an American woman of Middle Eastern heritage, the notion of rating a female candidate for marriage contingent to her virginity status is a demising expectation. There is a heavy reason that this is unforgivingly repulsive. Aside from what she has made of herself, her history, and all of the components that construct her, she is expected to be a virgin on her wedding night AND should be immediately open and submissive to sex . Define sex? It could be sweet tender love or rape. Sex with a stranger? Isn’t that prostitution or demeanor affiliated with irresponsible one night stands? Yes, that is a society’s norm. In general, marriages can be based on love, arranged externally, or internally in the family . But imagine being 23, and your marrying a man who has two wives. Has had ten girlfriends. Or heck for argument’s sake, you are both virgins but barely know each other. You open your legs and let him in just like that? I mean, what about self integrity. What happened to sporting the abaya all of a sudden? Was it that easy to take off for an all revealing raw look? I mean, it was exhausting enough trying to tuck your baby hair into your hijab to avoid scrutiny , judgement, harassment, or the side eye from across the room. It’s 0 to 100, real quick. Behind closed doors, trauma, anxiety, pain, and cognitive and behavioral alienation are bound to take place. And you have to visibly discharge of fluid blood that night. It’s compulsory, like your abaya and hijab, your silenced laughter and lowered voice, your gaze.
Oh, AND she’s expected to synchronize her internal organs to bare a child on the same night. Forgot to mention that, too.
Any thoughts?
